Heat Wave and Public Perception

When I went out to start my car at the asscrack of dawn to get the kids to school, I was shocked when my eyelashes didn’t immediately freeze to each other like they have been for the past couple weeks. I quickly realized that it was a full 20 degrees! That is 40 degrees warmer than 24 hours earlier

Needless to say, I am wearing shorts. They are Spanx shorts under my jeans, but shorts are shorts.

With the new found freedom of getting fresh air without freezing a lung, comes a huge sense of gratitude. I think that is why I love Minnesota so much. Just when you think you are going to die, Mother Nature swings into our little slice of heaven and lets us know what we were not forgotten by the powers that be. My children’s winter break was so cold, we really did not do much. Not that we normally would, but being stuck inside because we want to and being stuck inside because we need to are two totally different ball games. We all need a PJ day at home, but after 10 in an row, it gets a bit old. 

So school started back up (after 2 holy-shit-its-too-damn-cold-to-let-little-people-stand-outside-for-the-bus No School Days) and I literally skipped around my house. For about 10 minutes. Then I realized I missed the little A-holes. 

Which brings me to the Gratitude part. 

They are awesome kids. We have an awesome life together. It is not all glitter and sugar, laughs and shiny floors, it is often the opposite. The house is never fully clean, the kids are rarely ever happy at the same time (when they are you are guaranteed a Facebook video or picture), food is usually processed, baths are infrequent and precious TV time occurs more then I would like to admit.  

Social media is a great space to vent, brag or over-share. I am guilty of doing them all, and I am not ashamed.  Sitting behind a computer, I have slightly more control over the way I get perceived. I can be a snarky mom, a overwhelmed mom, a professional chef, a super creative talented mom, whatever. I try to be realistic in my posts, but there is no way not to sensor yourself or project a certain image.  The one thing I keep in mind when I am about to post something is will this help another person, now or in the future? Will someone laugh? Will it help another mom see that we are all flawed? Will it help show my daughters that we did have fun despite their accusations? If so, than I will keep posting. 

That being said, I do have something to say to the people who may think I am ungrateful or fake…

Go ahead.

Think away. I am not losing sleep over it. I am not sitting down trying to ensure that my public perception is one way or another. I am trying spread joy and, if need be, awareness. I vent. I bitch. I cry. But I do it to people I trust and that I know will help me move forward. I will share that experience honestly. If you think I am not being honest, just ask. I am a pretty open book. There just isn’t chapters devoted to one issue. 

I ain’t got time for that.


I need a young priest and an old priest…


Pretty sure I need an exorcist. Something has taken over my body and is making me do crazy things.

I am currently on day 30 of the Whole30. What the hell? 

I bought new tennis shoes and I am excited for my next day in the gym. Wait, what?

I ate some (like, very few some) sugar today (and pretty much everyday this week) and I have had a raging head ache since causing me to continue to try and kick the shit. Who are you?

Here is the kicker, I want to go to all (and there are a lot) of people whom I totally judged for having to modify everything in public because they were on some special food restriction for one reason or another and apologize because I am one of those people now…dammit.

Don’t get me wrong, I will still judge and ridicule, but it will be with a new found assertion because I can mock myself. “God, we are such tools” instead of “you are a tool”. See, much better.

This thing that has invaded my body has not caused any change in its physical appearance and that is not as big of a deal as I thought it would be (further proof that this alien force has messed with my psyche).

It has put on spandex-like materials and entered public areas with other humans like it is no big deal and proceeded to move my body in very unflattering ways (squatting, bending at waist and sticking head up while throwing arms behind my back, laying on my back and kicking my legs, even jogging on a movable strip of rubber?! wtf?!).

It has convinced me that it is okay to watch The Voice and then go to bed with little to no guilt.

The thing has even allowed me to eat a cookie and not feel like I need to go in the bathroom and whip my back with chains, but rather say “mmmm that was good, but I have a headache now and I don’t need anymore”. Those are not words I would say.

And the world hasn’t come crashing down just because my allergies are acting up and I am tired. Only once did I think I had a tumor in my sinuses. That is a flipping miracle,

And my gift to this thing for getting through the whole 30 days without giving up? A new pair of tennis shoes and overpriced workout pants. WHAAAA???? Not an entire cake? Not a whole box of Mike ‘n Ikes? Not even a Diet Coke? Nope. Things that will keep it going.

So now what?

I am going to keep going. I am going to embrace this alien thing inside of me and welcome it into the many personalities I have picked up on my journeys and encourage it to kick the shitty personalities that still remain out.  I am going to go to the gym tomorrow. I am going to make a new egg bake for my breakfast on the go. I am going to grab some more kale tomorrow for my green smoothies. I am going to eat some french fries if I want to (but only if I want to). I am not going to say I can’t have certain things (because I am not one of those people), but I am going to stay way from things that make me fell like less of a rock star.

I might fail. The thing inside of me may not want to fight all the time. I may want to throw in the towel. I may not “look” the way I feel.

And that is okay. This little slice of internet will be here for me to read and come back to.  I can always come back.

But hopefully I will stay.

Up next: How to feed your children shitty ass food while you eat clean and feel great without wondering why they are acting like assholes. (looking for a guest blogger, cause I have no idea)

Fall Food Withdrawal

Another thing about Fall (don’t worry,there are only a few more months of every post starting this way), is the cooking! Finally I can turn on the stove without having to strip down to my skivvies to prevent heat stroke. You are welcome neighbors and family.

That being said, I may have picked a really shitty time to attack the Whole30.  In case you are unaware of said program; the gist of it is no grains, dairy, legumes (beans for you who don’t want to Google legumes like I had to), dairy or sugar. So, I have been reduced to eating eggs, meat, eggs, veggies, eggs, fruit, eggs and an obnoxious amount of coconuts (oil, butter, milk…).

Truth be told, it is not so bad. I definitely have food aversions coupled with food addiction, making the thought of this really scary. But, for the first time in my life, I feel like I am ready to get down to the root of it.

I am on day 8.  There is nothing really glamorous about the process or really revolutionary for me. It has boiled down to some simple truths about myself that I have just had to accept:

  1. I need to stop eating like I am 22
  2. I need to stop eating shit
  3. I need fuel for my life and the right foods can give me that
  4. I need to be more active

So there it is. This 30-day adventure is meant to jump start putting those truths into action. So far it is working.

Here is some visual on the not-so-glamorous aspects…

I give you Banana Nut Portage


This was supposed to replace oatmeal. It did not. Not even a little.

HOWEVER, most things have worked awesomely! Because of great friends, I was gifted some great cookbooks and an All Powerful Spiralizer. If you are unfamiliar with a Spiralizer, become family. This is a recipe that uses one, along with a VitaMix. I am pretty sure I have not lived prior to the possession of these two beauties.  After the recipe, I will give some links for you to crack out on as well.

Pesto Zucchini Noodles

 IMG_3612 IMG_3615 IMG_3618   IMG_3622

Spiralizer 3-4 medium Zucchini

(you can freeze extra if you want to do more)

Go HERE to learn more about how to spiralize

Fry for about 15 minutes in a tablespoon of coconut oil

(longer to make softer, shorter to keep crunchy)

Make Pesto

combine in this order into high powered blender (ahem, VitaMix) or food processor:

1/3 cup olive oil

2 cups packed fresh basil

1/4 cup pine nuts

2 cloves of garlic

1/4 cup Parm. Cheese (optional, I leave out)

Pinch of salt


Add some sun warmed tomatoes from your garden and presto pasta BAM


Now, here are the good links…Got 3 hours to crack out???

Go use your Noodle (see what I did there) and enjoy!!


Fall Curb Appeal


I woke up this morning freezing my ass off and it was glorious. I love this Weather! The colors, the crisp air, the sound of dry leaves, the ability to wear sleeves without dying of heat, the guiltless cuddle on the couch with a book and a blanket…it is all so good!

This is also a great time to get the house ready for winter.  Whether you are planning on hanging tight this winter or are thinking of selling your house, this time of the year is perfect for planting trees and shrubs for the all coveted curb appeal. It is always my goal to have my home ‘sale ready’, despite the fact that we are not moving any time soon. Keep in mind, it is my goal, if you have been to my home you know that I fall short of that goal 99.5% of the time!

But, it goes without saying, great (or even good) landscaping and natural coverage adds both value and comfort to your home. We planted a maple tree in our front yard in September 2008 and watching it grow with our children and our family has been such a joy! It also provides much needed privacy for our bay window and front door.

If you are selling this fall or winter, a well maintained and structured landscape is usually the first impression buyers get of your home. It is worth the time and cost of updating or maintaining your greenery.

Here are some great resources on Minnesota Fall planting and maintaining:

 Lastly, check out my Fall Landscaping Pinterest Board for inspiration!

Get your booty to Gertens and get planting!


Happy Birthday to Me!

Yesterday I turned 35 years old. Can I get a hells yea??!!

I have not been much of a birthday fan. I do not mind the getting older thing, it is the I am kind of an asshole thing I can do without.

As long as I can remember, my birthdays have always been filled with family, love, gifts and good food. We all make a point to make sure the birthday person feels love. And I feel it from them, it just never came through from me to me. I have always filled the day reflecting on my life and my relationships and inevitably feel like I royally messed up another year. When I feel that way, the last thing I want to do is be with people who love me unconditionally.

This year was different. This year was amazing. The birthday routine is the same, but I am actually enjoying it this year!

The difference? I am happy with my life and I am happy with myself.

Looking back, I have never had a reason not to be happy with myself.  It was just  my head and mental illness.

This year has been the year of focusing on getting that shit figured out. I by no means have it figured out, but I am in the midst of trying, and that feels damn good.

The reflection this year, surprisingly,  did not really  happen. I did not even notice until today. I do not feel the need for it. I am happy in this day at this time and no need to replay anything.

The family gathering is this weekend and I better get some good shit.


Winter is coming…

If you are like me, that is some awesome ass news.

Not only because the show with that tag line will be back on (mmmmm John Snow….), but I am a lover of winter.

My family has always been an active winter family (summer too, but that is too normal to write a good post about). My favorite memories come from winter; St. Paul Winter Carnival, sledding, skating, shoveling (yep, I kinda love it), winter walks, a lot of good books and knitting. I am more of a it-is-a-beautiful-day-to-curl-up-with-a-book kind of girl, less of a it-is-a-beautiful-day-to-sit-outside-and-get-eaten-alive-by-bugs-while-sweating-your-ass-off girl.

Here in Minnesota, I think the real estate market should be the hottest in the coolest months. The statistics don’t always represent that, but what a better time to check out houses and move!

If looking, you can see how the house holds up in the winter chill; an important factor in Minnesota. Depending on your preference, you can get the idea of how cozy or how open the house is when the doors are closed and everyone is locked inside.

If moving, the winter months are perfect for getting helpers! People are generally feeling a bit cooped up and may be more willing to help out with the promise of pizza and football. Try getting people to move a king size bed up 3 fights of stairs in the summer. Unpacking is a bit easier when colder as well. You are inside already, what the hell else are you going to do.

The sales numbers generally increase after the super bowl. But, if you are on the fence, football season is a great opportunity to find the right place at the right price and some good helpers!

Think about it.

Welcome Back (and why I am here)

My head is slowly emerging from the fog of summer and the blur of first days of school.

While driving my youngest to school this morning, my mind was swimming on what I could do today to help my professional life grow and, of course, what I am going to cook for dinner. Getting her out of the car, she grabbed me around the neck, hugged me and whispered, “you are the best mommy ever. Thanks for carrying me.”

Best reminder ever.

When I decided to get into Real Estate, I did not have the vision of being , but to be a human among humans. To show my daughters that I can follow my dreams and they, too, can do and be anything they want.  I didn’t think of the money, the hours, or the way I should start dressing when I made this decision and stated moving toward it. Don’t get me wrong, I would love to do a bit of guilt-free shopping every now and again, the hours may be a bit difficult at first, but we will make it work, and I might need to invest in some better looking yoga pants and some more cardigans (you know to dress it up a bit).

I honestly thought about how much I would love doing it. Love spending my time researching facts and figures to help people understand the market; love reading people and hearing what they want and guiding them to that; love looking at houses and seeing the possibilities of making it someones home; love coming home and my kids asking how work was.

For the first time in my adult life, I feel no need to embellish my profession and make it seem like I am something I am not. When people ask me how my new ‘job’ is going, I can honestly answer “it is great”.  When they ask about how much money I am making or how many listings I have, I can answer them with the truth, “I am learning so much and I absolutely love doing it!” (Of course it is followed with a few numbers and maybe a sales pitch, but you get the point). This is my life now. It seems seamless to me. A perfect fit into my already full life.

*caution* super cliche saying ahead

I do not feel like this is a job start, but a new life path.  That brings me nothing but joy.

Maybe at some point I will get a pencil skirt, blazer and stilettos and hit the ground as saleswoman extraordinaire, but for now I thoroughly enjoy helping people and making my daughters proud of their Mommy because she is proud of herself.

Now I just need to figure out what the hell we are having for dinner.